"Strength in Connection" Journal

Inspiration: Claudia LechanceArtist: Rachel GingoldClaudia's Twist on Cancer: A silly game I play. Choose a friend and agree to say ‘rabbit, rabbit’ to each other on the first day of every month. Whoever says it first to the other gets all the good luck for the month. I am slightly superstitious. I remember the feeling so vividly. The feeling of that pang in my chest when Zach’s diagnosis became final. Every glimmer of hope that it was just a cold was suddenly erased from this planet. Worse yet, did I give cancer to my child? I had to ask the question. I needed to know. I am horrible at not knowing and telling the truth. The year was 2014, and at that time, genetic testing was not as sophisticated as we know it now. The answer I got from the oncologist, quite simply, in layman’s terms, was that Zach’s lymphoma was a “fluke.” I did not like hearing that word to describe Zach’s fate. It felt so trivial, even if I felt a little exonerated, and it felt so unacceptable. How is it possible